Books by Mike Haskins

Congratulations! You're 60! You've lived through the summer of love, the moon landings, Den and Angie and the entire history of the internet. This is the quiz book that will give your 60-year-old brain cells a nostalgic workout. So what are you waiting for? Let's take a quizzical look back at your life.

Hundreds of laugh-out-loud jokes to make your Christmas a real cracker!

Packed with cricket's greatest stories, from both on and off the field, famous quips, insults, pranks, mishaps, incredible facts and outrageous incidents - perfect for the cricket nut in your home.

A hilarious collection of the weirdest, stupidest and most outrageous things ever said on the internet on sites such as Facebook, Twitter, Ebay, Amazon, YouTube and even in good old-fashioned emails. Years ago if you said or did something stupid or embarrassing, it would have remained relatively private and have would soon been forgotten. Now thanks to advances in technology every cringe-making remark that we make online is preserved not only for the rest of eternity but is also instantly available for all the world to see! Wow! I'm a Genieous! presents an irresistible collection of ill-thought out comments, opinions, online disputes and sheer unashamed ignorance.So join us as we find the people who put the twit in Twitter and the mess in instant message. Contents include: Stupid Questions and Stupid Answers: e.g. "e;Does anyone know Obama's last name?"e; "e;Are there any lakes in the Lake District?"e; Angry Outbursts: Furious, insane or wildly over the top comments from You Tube etc Harrods it ain't - buying and selling on the internet: "e;I won a filthy Powerbook 540 which took about one month to arrive. The seller clearly used rubbish from their bin to pack the box; complete with McDonalds wrappers with old french fries and lettuce!"e; Observations To Leave You Speechless: "e;Does it rain in Australia? Because it's the other side of the world doesn't the rain just fall away into space?"e;, "e;The Olympics has been going three thousand years?! We're only up to 2012!"e; "e;I like to tape my thumbs to my hands to see what it would be like to be a dinosaur."e; Reviews from Hell: "e;The beach was too sandy and there were too many fish in the sea..."e;, "e;We went on holiday to Spain and had problems with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish"e; Online Slip Ups: Internet-based disasters e.g. the school headmaster who asked his bursar to reply to a complaint from an old lady by telling her to "e;get stuffed"e; but accidentally copied her in on the message Communication Problems: Extraordinary spelling mistakes and terrible grammar e.g. "e;nothing more fun than wachting sex and city and raping Christmas pressants"e;, "e;Why is the USA bombin Labia?"e; People Who Really Don't Deserve Our Money: e.g. An email from a Euromillions winner promising you a share of their win. As if!

Mirror, Signal, Manoeuvre . . . Good Boy!

Searching for the ultimate stimulant? Something you can have on the bus in the morning or in the ambient comfort of your own home? The latest User's Guide - a totally natural and controlled experience - is just what you've been looking for. It contains everything you always wanted to know about drugs but were afraid to ask: The history of recreational drugs, a catalogue of natural highs and pharmaceuticals, the physiological effects, drugs and religion, drugs and the law, drug customs from around the world, trafficking drugs, drugs in literature, film and art, famous drug takers, drug slang, urban myths, drug legends and horror stories, quotations, tales of outrageous behaviour and a kilo of curious facts and figures. Did you know that- --Scientists have found traces of marijuana among Shakespeare's personal effects--Victorian prime minister Lord Rosebery would snort cocaine to help pep up his public speaking

Man Walks Into A Bar is a one-stop shop for anyone who likes to hear and tell jokes. The jokes are ordered thematically - wives, husbands, doctors, lawyers, the French, the Germans, jokes about nuns, jokes about monkeys, the lot. There are also regular panels which group jokes by type too - Essex girls, changing a lightbulb etc. Our material will turn you into the toast of your local pub or make you loathed in your own home - remember, it is all in the telling. From the sublimely erudite to stuff Frank Carson would turn down (the book has a 'world's worst jokes' section), this book can service you with every joke you'll ever need.What do you call an eskimo chav?InnuinnitWhat did the zen student say at the hamburger stand?Make me one with everythingWhat's Irish and lives in the garden?Paddy O'Furniture