Books published by Eraserhead Press

On the dodgeball court, no one can hear you scream. Justin Lucas just started at a new high school, but there are no classes in really important stuff like English literature, mathematics, science, or history. Instead, the entire curriculum is dedicated to playing Dodgeball. Justin is...perplexed. Where are the pencils and textbooks? Why are there so many explosives strapped to the balls? And what's up with the barbed wire? Does the school administration really think it's appropriate to wrap the balls in barbed wire? Dodgeball High does not seem like a safe environment for a young man. But his classmates don't care. They kinda remind him of junior Mafia Dons, little serial killers, and pint-sized dictators from third world countries. And they are all really good at Dodgeball (and the shedding of their classmates' blood), while Justin totally sucks. And to make matters worse, Justin's parents are like...total dicks. They won't let him go to a different school because they think he's full of crap about this "Dodgeball nonsense." Not to mention that Dodie Manson, the greatest player in the school, has a gigantic crush on Justin. And whoever Dodie wants, Dodie gets, and her BFs have a habit of experiencing intense pleasure prior to their "mysterious" decapitations. Does Justin have what it takes to survive and make it to the top of his class before graduation? Or will he be eliminated permanently? Read Dodgeball High to find out, but watch out for the ball that's coming at your head!

Everyone in the world committed suicide at the same time . . .Thus begins the surreal tale of an old man living alone in an empty world after everyone else on Earth killed themselves for no particular reason at all. In search for other survivors, he drifts in a floating house out to sea until he comes to a mysterious structure in the middle of the ocean. It is a building shaped like two giant nude women conjoined at the back. And issuing from a lighted window, echoing on the ghostly wind, is the sound of hundreds of meowing patchwork cats. Sea of the Patchwork Cats is a sad dreamlike tale set in the quiet ashes of the human race. A must-read for Mellick enthusiasts who also adore The Twilight Zone.

Kevin L Donihe is in the vanguard of a new type of brave and original writers that combine fun and childlike imagination with rich poignant themes. In his second collection, Papier Mache Jesus, Donihe's surreal wit and beautiful mind-bending imagination is on full display with stories such as All Children Go to Hell, Happiness is a Warm Gun, The Vibrant Tools of Dr. Imago, The Boy Memorial, and Swimming in Endless Night.

There is something in the local cemetery that comes out at night.Something that is unearthing corpses and killing people. It's thesummer of 1984 and Timmy and his friends are looking forward to noschool, comic books, and adventure. But instead they will be fightingfor their lives. The ghoul has smelled their blood and it is afterthem.But that's not the only monster they will face this summer . . .From award-winning horror master Brian Keene comes a novel ofmonsters, murder, and the loss of innocence.

Hicks, Hogs, Horror! When Herconium Siliam Slogg woke up in his outhouse, it was just another day on the farm, but then skull-headed frogs fell from the sky, and things started getting a mite strange in the backwoods of Slogg's Holler. Soon the townsfolk are sproutin' extra heads and taking a bite out of their neighbors.... And a two thousand pound hog has opened its third eye, hypnotizing the minds of the Honorable Mayor Phigg and mysterious man of the cloth Reverend Horel Burnbroom, not to mention aspiring country-western singer Churlotta Lovelorn. These three yokels and their monsterized cannibalistic kin will soon be drawn into a web of weirdness that can only result in the end of humanity and a down-home good time!

MYKLE HANSEN gives mortality the finger! Death by sandwich! Death by yoga! Death by blimp! In HOORAY FOR DEATH, Famous Author Mykle Hansen draws unconventional humor from deaths tiny and large, and invites you to laugh while you can. Meet The Great Mecanico, super-scientist of super-science, a man who can fix anything but his mother's health. Meet BLIMPMAN, master of the Weight-Loss Ray, and his arch-nemesis Doctor Walrus! Meet Death himself -- a single, deadly male, looking for a lover who will die slowly. Meet Penelope, your dead wife who phones you from the underworld to say she met someone deader than you. Loaded with Hansen's signature wit and weirdness, Hooray for Death is a great achievement of comedy, tragedy and hope.

A tour-de-force. A harrowing comic masterpiece. A timely novel that transcends the times. An instant American classic. This is what critics are not saying about Bradley Sands' latest magnum opus, Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel. A novel in three parts, Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel is the story of one boy detective, the worst ninja in the world, and the great American fast food wars. It is a novel of loss, destruction, and-incredibly-genuine hope. Please Do Not Shoot Me in the Face: A Novel contains three classic Bradley Sands novellas: "Frankie Nougat and the Missing Heart," "Cheesequake Smash-Up," and "Apocalypse Ninja."

Norman Spooter awakens one morning to find that his eyeballs have fallen in love with each other. They proceed to tear themselves out of his head, steal his car keys, and take off for parts unknown... So he does what any of us would probably do in that situation... he goes back to bed, hoping it'll all resolve itself. Unfortunately, in the middle of the night, a pack of WOLVES moves in. The worst thing is, they're party wolves... BUT they gave him a security deposit, so he decides he's going out to get his eyeballs back. He joins forces on his epic quest with a woman named Zoe, who has a mysterious secret almost as crazy as Norman's Party Wolves. Besides, she needs him too... She's on the run from her psychopathic ex-boyfriend, who happens to be a dangerous sociopath, a classic car enthusiast and, worst of all, a fully grown walrus. The road trip/chase novel is flipped on its head with everyone chasing everyone... explosions, battles and madness are the drivers in this particular race, along with a few stops in such places as the Motel Sick and a cult town in North Dakota featuring some dangerous hooded guys who'll pretty much marry anything to anything. With violence and insanity nipping at his heels and a race against the clock to get his body parts back, this could turn out very badly for Norman Spooter.

HOLY SHIT! THIS IS THE BEST BOOK EVER!!! It's kind of like that awesome movie, Frozen, you know where there's those people stuck on a ski-lift while surrounded by wolves. But imagine if instead of wolves they were bears. And the bears spit wolves! Like they're fucking grenade launchers or something! It's awesome!!! And then there's these gigantic death worms that come out of the ground and kill and eat everyone. And they're HUGE. Big enough to eat breweries and shit. And it's all because of 2012! I KNOW! But, don't worry, there's a bunch of Mexican Ninjas with invisibility ponchos and throwing-sombreros that are going to save the day. They are so badass. And the main character Dave does some stuff, too. He can pull things out of the air, like burgers and Armani suits. (If I could do that I'd be eating McDouble cheeseburgers constantly!) He and his friend Worm-Head Girl, along with the Mexican Ninjas, and a veterinarian named LeAnn must try to save Phoenix from total annihilation. But they better hurry up because these gigantic death worms are going to utterly fucking destroy everything in like two seconds!! CHECK OUT THE MOST AWESOME BOOK YOU COULD EVER POSSIBLY IMAGINE!! IT'S THE BEST BOOK EVER!!!

Alice in Wonderland-with garbage and a dead stripper! Coco takes off her clothes for a living - until some nasty little bitch kills her while she's dancing. Thrown in the dumpster by her sleazebag boss, Coco awakens in a land of trash. With her new friend, Rudy (a dying fly), and her knight in garbage armor, the undead dancer tries to find her way home. But first she must escape from the evil Queen of this trashscape - a jealous and insane Ruler of Refuse who has an intense fear of flies. With hints of The Matrix and The Whiz, this heady trip will satisfy your cravings for twisted fairy tales, rotting garbage, and charming weirdos. Long live the Queen!

No writer is more hardcore, offensive, or notorious than Edward Lee.His world is one of torture, bizarre fetishes, and alien autopsies.Prepare yourself, as these three novellas from the king ofsplatterspunk are guaranteed to make you gasp, gag, and laugh your ass off.The Decortication TechnicianWhat secrets do a crashed alien spaceship hold? One man and hissurgical tools will find out.The CyesolagniacA man with a pregnancy fetish meets the girl of his dreams-and hisworst nightmares.Room 415From his hotel room window, Flood will see his darkest desires become real.

They came to the deserted island to compete on a popular realitytelevision show. Each one hoped to be the last to leave. Now they'rejust hoping to stay alive, because the island isn't deserted afterall. Contestants are disappearing, but they aren't being eliminated bythe game. They're being taken by the monstrous, half-human creaturesthat live deep in the jungle. The men will be slaughtered. The womenwill be kept alive as captives. Night is falling, the creatures arecoming, and rescue is so far away...Deadite Press is proud to present Brian Keene's tribute to the late,great Richard Laymon!"Bloody, vile, violent and nasty. Castaways is a can't put down pageturner." -House of Horrors"Much like Laymon, Keene provides all kinds of thrills here... But BrianKeene has his own voice, too, one just as good a the late greatmaster, Richard Laymon." -SFRevu

Winner of the Wonderland Book Award for Novel of the Year, 2011. Haunt is a tripping-balls Los Angeles noir, where a mysterious dame drags you through a time-warping Bizarro hall of mirrors. She's the girl of your dreams. Too bad she's dead. OR IS SHE?In Haunt, "you" are the hapless corporate tool and rock star wannabe turned private Dick. Here, even your most inconsequential choices can make all the difference between a Hollywood ending on the beach and sucking cock for clues.This is genial lowbrow high lit weirdness: the funny, punchy cousin of Danielewski's House of Leaves, a Vonnegut and Salinger paté on a choose-your-own cracker, with a lapdance from Nancy Drew. As much fun to make as it is to eat!Laura Lee Bahr is an award-winning indie actor/playwrite/screenwriter with a gift for the hilariously, tragically absurd. Haunt is her first novel.

On the seventh day, the Flying Spaghetti Monster said, "Read me, for I am good." In Amazing Stories, the Flying Spaghetti Monster goes on trial to earn his godhood among a council of deities that includes Jehovah, the Buddha, Ganesh, Cthulhu, and Charlie Sheen. He is interviewed for an exclusive episode of the celebrity talk show In the Monster's Studio to discuss his relationship with Godzilla and other famous monsters. He rears his head at an archeological dig in a desert wasteland and dines with a horde of food demons in Hell. He rescues pirates, authors, and prisoners from the cold hand of death while banishing children to suffering and starvation. He is a just god, but only if you compliment his vodka sauce. Like an all-spaghetti evening of Adult Swim, Amazing Stories of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will show you the many realms of His Noodly Appendage. Learn of those who worship him and the lives he touches in distant, mysterious ways. Enjoy with Italian food and a side of Darwinism.

Part man. Part wolf. 100% crippled. Welcome to Fetish Flights, the only airline where BDSM flight attendants service your every need. Aboard a red-eye flight from Tokyo, Japan to Portland, Oregon, a disabled Vietnam vet is harboring a secret. Every full moon he turns into a ravenous killing machine. When he transforms mid-flight and slaughters most of the passengers and crew, a Japanese punk band, a limbless superhero, a Muslim terrorist, and two stoner pilots must fight to stay alive until they reach land. In the spirit of Snakes on a Plane and Tokyo Gore Police, Cripple Wolf is a hilarious, perverted, and hyper-violent ride for fans of video games, comic books and trash culture. This collection includes six additional stories: Punk Rock Nursing Home, Adrift with Space Badgers, Cook for Your Life, Just Another Day in the Park, Frosty and the Full Monty, and House of Cats.

Jonathan Vandervoo lives a carefree life in a house made of legos, spending his days building lego sculptures and his nights getting drunk with his only friend-an alcoholic sumo wrestler named Shoji. It's a pleasant life with no responsibility, until the day he meets Lici. She's a soul-sucking demon from hell with red skin, glowing eyes, a forked tongue, and pointy red devil horns... and she happens to be nine months pregnant with Jonathan's baby. Now Jonathan must do the right thing and marry the succubus or else her demonic family is going to rip his heart out through his ribcage and force him to endure the worst torture hell has to offer for the rest of eternity. But can Jonathan really love a fire-breathing, frog-eating, cold-blooded demoness? Or would eternal damnation be preferable? Either way, the big day is approaching. And once Jonathan's conservative Christian family learns their son is about to marry a spawn of Satan, it's going to be all-out war between demons and humans, with Jonathan and his hell-born bride caught in the middle. I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter is an adorable, violent, fantastical love story-a romantic comedy for the bizarro fiction reader.

Killing children is an ugly business, but the alternative is so much uglier. Abner Slate just watched his five-year-old daughter, Olive, kill his wife and son. Olive is a sopath. Born without souls, sopaths are children who will lie, cheat, rape, and murder to get what they want. There's one in every family these days, destroying America's heartland from within. After murdering his daughter in self-defense, Abner is taken in by a secret network of sopath victims called Pariah. Through Pariah, he meets other sopath victims who band together to form a temporary nuclear family. But the sopath threat is getting worse, and soon their quaint little neighborhood is overrun by murderous, drug-running children. Now, on a mission for Pariah, Abner and his makeshift family must travel across the country to a mysterious town that contains a secret powerful enough to stop the sopath crisis. Instead, they find the most seductive and ruthless sopath of all. Her name is Autopsy, and she would like to add Abner to her slave collection. The old morality is dead. Now the sopaths will stalk the earth.

"Walking Wounded is well-suited to an era of alternative lifestyles, New Age mysticism and senseless violence." -Publishers Weekly "At the heart of all Devereaux's writing are the twin embryos of love and pain. In Walking Wounded he has explored their perverse dependency with an expert's tender touch. This book is both a challenge and a rare treat!" -Poppy Z. Brite Katt has the power to heal disease with her touch. Every day she saves lives and no one knows. But her heart is filled with hate-hate toward her cheating husband. After he is diagnosed with Huntington's disease, Katt learns she can make illness worse. It's the power to commit the perfect murder. But a local serial killer armed with a power-drill has entered their lives and the perfect murder just got a lot messier... From Robert Devereaux, the celebrated master of bizarre horror, comes a novel of love, betrayal, and death by power-tools.

"Violent, erotic, blasphemous, and extreme." -Fear Zone"Without apologies, White tears through your emotions, from sympathy tohate, humor to shock..." -Horror WebFrom a world-ending orgy to home liposuction. From the hidden desiresof politicians to a woman with a fetish for lions. This is a placewhere necrophilia, self-mutilation, and murder are all roads to love.Like Porno for Psychos collects the most extreme erotic horror from thecelebrated hardcore horror master. Wrath James White is your guidethrough sex, death, and the darkest desires of the heart.

Super Friends meets Gorillas in the Mist Four students and their anthropology professor journey to a remote island to study its indigenous population. But this is no ordinary native culture. They're super heroes and villains with flesh costumes and outlandish abilities like self-detonation, musical eyelashes, microwave hands, whalemancing, super boobs, and the power to turn anything into fuzzy pink bunnies. When evil government forces threaten the island, the students and super people must join together to fight. Only through their combined powers can they save themselves from total destruction. Bizarro author Kevin Shamel unleashes a novel of cyber-soldiers, colossal battles and naked super heroes. Excelsior!

Shark Sex, mutant cats, and strange sexually transmitted diseases. Over the past few decades, sexually transmitted diseases have evolved in unusual ways. Herpes, AIDS, Gonorrhea; these are all STDs of the past. These days, sexually transmitted diseases are more extreme and bizarre. Not exactly diseases anymore, they are more like sexually transmitted body modifications. There's an STD that changes your hair color, an STD that causes your toes to grow larger, one causes you to grow extra breasts on your body, another causes your skin to grow long metal spikes, and there's an especially annoying STD that causes you to ejaculate miniature eyeballs. Tonight is Share Your STD Night at the Demon Seed Swingers Club. Although most members of society fear the idea of contracting these diseases, there are some underground deviants who embrace them. They believe the diseases make them strange, unique, and beautiful. So they come together once a month to trade their wonderful STDs with each other in a surreal, fantastical orgy. However, tonight will not be like other nights. There's a new disease spreading through the sex club, a disease that causes people to become rabid bloodthirsty killing machines. As the infected rampage through the Demon Seed, the survivors realize there's only one thing they can do to survive the night: turn their grotesque STDs into deadly super weapons. Also featuring the short stories: "Candy-Coated" - A buff dude with a lollipop for a head has a hard time picking up the laydaaays due to all of the bearded truckers who keep trying to lick his head. "Ear Cat" - A Kitty of the Month Club selection gone horribly, horribly wrong. "City Hobgoblins" - A member of a punk rock band falls in love with a shark-like creature. (a prequel to the cult novel Satan Burger) "Porno in August" - A group of porn actors find themselves floating in the middle of the ocean, unable to remember who they are or why they are there. (Chosen for The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror)

Ralph was a traveling dildo salesman. His selection was vast, and all models were stamped MADE IN HEAVEN. Under the watchful glare of a giant eyeball in the sky, Ralph walks door to door selling dildos. He doesn't know why he sells dildos, but he does know that with each house, and each strange customer, he moves closer to solving the mystery of the eternal dildo curse. A nightmare comedy about destiny, faith, and sex toys, The Traveling Dildo Salesman is another classic from Kevin L. Donihe, the Wonderland Award-winning author of House of Houses and Night of the Assholes. This edition also features Donihe's most lurid and infamous short stories: Milky Agitation, Two-Way Santa, The Helen Mower, Living Room Zombies, and Revenge of the Living Masturbation Rag.

Life is pain . . . . . . or at least it is for Jason. Born with a rare central nervous disorder, every sensation is pain. Every sound, scent, texture, flavor, even every breath, brings nothing but mind-numbing pain. His days are spent in a padded room addicted to every narcotic known to man. At night he is sealed in a sensory deprivation bag to block out the entire world. Pain is all Jason has ever known about the world. Until the arrival of Yogi Arjunda of the Temple of Physical Enlightenment. He claims to be able to help Jason, to be able to give him a life of more than agony. But the treatment leaves Jason changed and he wants to share what he learned. He wants to share his pain . . . From hardcore horror master Wrath James White, comes a novella of pain, pleasure, and transcendental splatter.

The Bitches are back . . .They call themselves the Warriors, their enemies call them the Bitches. They are a gang of man-eating, motorcycle-riding, war-hungry werewolf women, and they are the rulers of the wasteland.Following his 2009 Wonderland Book Award-winning novel, Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland, Carlton Mellick III returns with Barbarian Beast Bitches of the Badlands, a collection of three interconnected novellas that take place before, during, and after the events of the first book. Including: BARBARIAN BEAST BABES OF THE BADLANDSTalon and a party of warrior biker women must hunt down a pack of giant wolves that have gone rabid. HORRENDOUS HORROR OF THE HATEFUL HAMBURGLARA band of mutant soldiers led by the deadly samurai, Hamburglar, investigates an outpost deep in the wasteland that has become plagued by a horde of deranged undead killing machines. FEROCIOUS FEMALE FURRIES IN THE FORBIDDEN ZONEAfter Talon is infected with a strange mind-killing parasite, Slayer must lead a party of wolf women into the Forbidden Zone in order to find a cure.

Ten ridiculously stereotypical consumer victims (a yuppie, a housewife, a retiree, a jock, a bible thumper, a cowboy, a preppy, a gamer, a goth, and a white suburban gangsta) find themselves unable to leave the mall one day. There is nothing stopping them. The doors are unlocked. Other shoppers are able to come and go as they please. But for some inexplicable reason, these ten people cannot pry themselves away from their shopping miasma. The mall closes, and they won't leave. Days pass, and they're still there, eating meals in the food court and sleeping in department store bedroom displays. Then they begin to die off, one by one, murdered by a mysterious killer, and they still won't allow themselves to escape.

"Let me unequivocally state that Bryan Smith creates the most fantastic, sick, demented and twisted characters in horror fiction today." -Famous Monsters of Filmland "I look forward to spending a weekend with a new Bryan Smith book the way I used to look forward to spending a weekend with a new Richard Laymon novel. In my view, there isn't higher praise than that."--Brian Keene, author of The Rising."Holy. Shit." -Horror Drive-InThe road to hell is paved with angels and demons. Brain worms and dead prostitutes. Serial killers and frustrated writers. Zombies and Rock 'n Roll. And once you start down this path, there is no going back.Collecting thirteen tales of shock and terror from Bryan Smith, Highways to Hell is a non-stop road-trip of cruelty, pain, and death. Grab a seat, Smith has such sights to show you.

In 2003, Brian Keene's The Rising revived horror literature's dormantobsession with zombies.In 2007, Brian Keene's Dead Sea knocked that obsession on its ass...The city streets are no longer safe. They are filled instead with theliving dead, rotting predators driven only by a need to kill and eat.Some of the living still struggle to survive, but with each passingday, their odds grow worse. Some survivors have fled, franticallysearching for a place to escape, even briefly, the slaughter aroundthem. For Lamar Reed and a handful of others, that safe haven is anold Coast Guard ship out at sea, with plenty of water between them andthe zombies. These desperate survivors are completely isolated fromthe dangers of the mainland. But their haven will soon become adeathtrap, and they'll learn that isolation can also mean no escape!Deadite Press is proud to present this Author's Preferred version ofKeene's over-the-top cult classic, which includesnever-before-published material!