An Eye for a Tooth

If you read Bernard's story you might feel guilty for all the times you've felt that you've been hard done by, because Bernard's life has been infinitely sadder than your own. Were this not the case, you would be far too unhappy an individual to even contemplate reading a humorous book.
Almost every person he has encountered has brought Bernard ill fortune. From the inert father who neglected him and the sadistic teacher he only wished had neglected him, to the imagined girlfriend and the unimaginable wife. They all contribute to Bernard's undoing, admittedly, it has to be said, with a modicum of assistance from the hapless Bernard himself.
But has Bernard discovered an unthinkable loophole in the law through which he might wreak a deadly revenge, yet remain totally immune from prosecution? Is the simple logic of his outrageous demand about to confront Lady Justice with an insoluble problem?