Gift of Continence

Fiona MacDougall is not the sharpest tool in the box. Although she doesn't really want to get married, she does so on the strength of having found the perfect wedding dress.
Everything that can possibly go wrong with a wedding does, and so do a few things that can't (for normal people, anyway). Fiona, with her new husband, Tim, and her cat, Moses, settles down to housekeeping.
Fiona's domestic gifts are not great, but she manages to muddle along until the day she makes a shocking discovery. Her subsequent efforts to deal with the terrible truth she has uncovered make her disastrous wedding and incompetent housekeeping look positively normal.